300 was a groundbreaking movie for HD slow-motion fight sequences, and ended in the nontraditional, Rocky way, in which the little guy puts up a valiant fight, but ultimately loses. Well, just like Rocky, the fight goes on with 300: Rise of an Empire. The story picks up where the original left off, with 300 dead Spartans at the feet of Xerxes, and audiences undoubtedly experience nostalgic feelings of hatred for all things Persian, bald or covered in gold.
We saw what the Spartan army could do on land, but any military-minded moviegoer has got to be wondering how these scantily clad soldiers would fare on the open ocean. Well wonder no more! Plenty of aquatic fight scenes and fiery oceanic horizons to appease anyone’s crazy desire to see the most ironic way to die while surrounded by water.
300: Rise of an Empire won’t be hitting theaters until March 2014. There’s still plenty of time to implement that insane workout regimen we all told ourselves we’d totally do to get in “300” shape. Just don’t expect the sword wielding or spear throwing skills to come quite as easily as the 12-pack abs, which also probably won’t come easily.
I’m gonna go ahead and make a bold prediction for the future. There are only two routes this movie can take, in my opinion. I could see the Greeks winning this one, thus evening the series at one to one, and then five years from now, 300 3 ( …900?) debuts featuring battles between the two armies’ air forces. Or, Xerxes and the Persian Empire prevail again, and 300 3 is just two hours of pampering and slavery. That is, of course, with the thought in mind that more money can be made off of this franchise. And why wouldn’t a sure thing like this be easy money?
Enough about the future, live in the now! Check out the trailer for 300: Rise of an Empire, and start working on those abs.